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Remembering a Loved One

When someone we love dies there is an aching emptiness that is felt.  They are no longer here to share our days.  To find a way after their death, to keep their memory alive, can give some comfort while we are learning to live life without them.


Create a memory flower garden plant bulbs or perennials and perhaps place an angel statue, garden cross or plaque in amongst the flowers.

Plant a tree in your garden in memory of your loved one.  Choose one that bears fruit or flowers and with each new bloom, there will be hope that life can regain its beauty.

If you don't have a garden, plant something flowering in a pot.  Some fruit trees can even be grown in pots and you can always take this with you if you move.

Write a note to your loved one.  Attach it to a helium balloon and release it into the air.  This can be done on any day where their absence may be more painful their birthday, Christmas, anniversary of their death or wedding anniversary.

Create a special memory album of your loved one.  Add personal details about them funny stories, certificates they may have achieved or newspaper articles.  This may be painful to do as you reflect back but once done it will be a treasured memory of their life.  Keep it in a place where others can share and reflect back on the memories.

Contact your local council or a club that your loved one may have belonged to and enquire about having a bench erected in their memory.

Each Christmas hang a special decoration on the tree in memory of your loved one.

Light a special candle or oil burner on Birthdays, anniversaries or any celebrations where their absence is felt.  This is a way to remember the love that you shared as a flame of eternal love.

Some people find comfort in visiting the cemetery but you may wish to create a special place in your home in memory of your loved one.  Sit and allow yourself time to remember and mourn you loss. Some say it helps to have a journal to write your thoughts and feelings.

Wear or carry something linking you to your loved one.  This may be a locket with their photograph, something that was given to you at the time of their death or jewellery that once belonged to them.

Create a DVD of memorable photographs, a celebration of their life.  This can be played at family get togethers. Copies can be made and given to others who were close to the deceased.  If you are not computer literate perhaps a friend or family member can help you with this or alternatively there are companies that provide this service.

Create a CD of their favourite songs. Music can evoke overwhelming emotions and in the early stages of grief this may be too painful to listen to but when the time is right it will be beautiful reminder of who they were.

Have a memory box to hold treasured keepsakes of your loved one.  This can be anything you like, their jewellery, photographs, a lock of their hair, letters they have written, a poem, funeral momentums or sympathy and funeral attendance cards.

There are many memorial websites, create a space on one of these sites in memory of your loved one.

Celebrate their birthday.  Bake a cake and have a get together.  Play their favourite music and reminisce about the special and not so special attributes of you loved one.  Laugh, cry and remember.

"We live as long as we're remembered"

This site is for information and support only, not a substitute for professional advice.

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